Category Archives: Musings and Thoughts

The Wedding Gown

Satin, lace and crinoline. 

     A creamy, dreamy, fairy-tale gown, beautifully adorned with a sequined bodice shimmering in the mid-morning sun.

She, a bride of beauty. Of eternal optimism.

He, the groom, waiting for her, dressed in the tartan of his native clan: 

     Kilt, sporran, hose.

          Looking dapper. Seeming happy.

Honeysuckle-covered trellis highlighted with lavender sweet peas and fuchsia roses, chosen to complement her bridal bouquet. 

     Verdant lawn filled with close friends and family.

          Celtic tunes floating in the warm autumn air.

A resplendent ceremony ~ exchanging vows of holy matrimony, of everlasting love.

Her optimism eventually overshadowed by the slow and torturous onslaught of futility, heartache and shame.

The wedding gown given away, years later, to a second-hand store… like an old t-shirt… like an unwanted possession.

     Yet offering, perhaps, a semblance of hope to the next bride.

… she does not mourn the end of her marriage. 

     Only the misconceptions of love.

Deep down inside… her heart still flutters with romantic possibilities.

And hope.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

©2011 Enchanted Zaftig

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Pheromones and Fornication

Have you ever experienced the sensation of your inner sexual core releasing within you, traveling through your veins and slowly seeping out? As though every pore of your skin is emitting pheromones into the atmosphere, drawing potential lovers to your side?

It’s interesting how often I feel this way lately.

The end of my sexually-repressed, emotionally-numb marriage seems to have opened a tremendous floodgate of self-awareness. Now, I wander through life splendidly in tune with my femininity and perfectly alive in my own skin.

Silhouette ~ Kuller Mietze

 

There is something enigmatic and exhilarating about going for a walk, pushing a grocery cart, waiting for a cup of coffee and feeling a radiant aura of sexual energy emanating from me, giving off heat. 

Which others notice.

A look, a passing glance, a quick meeting of the eyes. Flirtation in a breath.

And occasionally, the world evaporates; for a brief moment, existence becomes a universe of two:

Me… him… and the fraction of a possibility for fornication which may never come to fruition but which feels enticingly delicious to consider.

Sometimes, the sexual energy radiating between our untouched flesh is like an invisible flame that causes the hair at the nape of my neck to tingle. 

Causes the moistness between my thighs to increase. 

It is fleeting. But vitalizing.

And I walk away embraced in harmony with the inner seductress traveling through my veins.

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~ Her Hips ~

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

When a zaftig woman walks, her hips flirt with the world.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

'Sylvia' ~ Lady At Large Art

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Masculine Meditation

The scent of a man…

Primal and invigorating. A robust fragrance of masculinity and earth, like sweat and salt and dirt swirled together in an aphrodisiac of physical strength, carnal aptitude and primordial sexuality. An elixir which encompasses prowess, stamina and body heat.

What’s become of man’s machismo? That natural, rugged aura which seems to have evolved into something less instinctual. Once  upon a time, the husky personae of the Marlboro Man was considered desirable. Now, it seems we prefer the ‘metrosexual’ ~ a new species of man  who concerns himself with proper grooming and proper fashion, willing to “man~scape” himself into an androgynous existence while simultaneously blurring the lines of his distinct gender identity. 

It saddens me how we’ve managed to emasculate the male population with the consistent berating of his natural character ~ particularly through the media, where he is portrayed as incompetent and obtuse ~ not able to clean correctly, take care of children correctly or even choose beer correctly. We’ve insisted as a society that he’s incapable of completing the simplest of everyday tasks.

Which is a complete load of rubbish.

If women no longer populated the earth, men would still survive through the length of their lifetimes.  They would forage for food, make adequate shelter and continue on with everyday activities. Because they are perfectly capable of doing so.

So why do we strive to quash that spirit? Have we gone so far with the feminist movement that we’ve over-compensated in our attempt to tilt the world in a different direction?

I am a very feminine woman. I am also intelligent, strong and independent. I’m sure I would exist just fine without the contribution or assistance of the male population, however I don’t particularly want to. Why would I want to…? Setting aside the obvious sexual/mating aspect, men and women were created to complement one another in their existence, offering unique qualities and capabilities and specializing in areas that the opposite gender may not.

Am I wrong to prefer men to be men? Real men. True men. Testosterone-laden hunters and gatherers and providers who also strive to be good leaders and protectors and fathers; who exude strength and wisdom and the ability to work hard and get their hands dirty for the greater good; who know how to treat a lady and raise a child and help others without reciprocal expectations; who think intellectually, act responsibly and love accordingly. 

In essence, a man with integrity, fortitude and compassion, who embraces his masculine disposition and makes a woman glad to be female in his presence.

Is it possible to rekindle these inherent traits that have been so woefully repressed and discouraged? To release them from their invisible bonds and bring them back to the surface where they belong?

I hope so.

Because the scent of a man is…

Primal and invigorating. A robust fragrance of masculinity and earth, like sweat and salt and dirt swirled together in an aphrodisiac of physical strength, carnal aptitude and primordial sexuality. An elixir which encompasses prowess, stamina and body heat…

I desire it.

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Love Accordingly: An Enchanted Zaftig Challenge

Although I have a plethora of acquaintances, I find myself fortunate in this mature stage of my life to have a handful of truly magnificent, genuine friends ~ women who continually shine light into my life with their charisma, sweet spirits and positive attitudes. Without these women, finding the strength to initiate major life changes, including divorce from a controlling husband, would have felt insurmountable. During my bouts of depression and exhaustion, each of these lovely ladies find ways to cradle and uplift me, never allowing me to fall too far nor give up on attaining happiness.

I try to reciprocate that empathy and amiable refuge as often as possible. I listen with intelligence, laugh with enthusiasm, shed tears with understanding, advise with sound ideas and praise with kindness and love.

It’s what the principles of friendship and human compassion are based upon ~ a foundation of trust, affection and sympathy.

By chance, I discovered this photo awhile ago, and I’m so glad I did, for its simple yet poignant message has quickly become a personal mantra for me:

   

In this life, in this world, it’s quite easy to give into selfish behavior and focus on one’s own survival, especially when trusting another person can oftentimes lead to disappointment. But the truth is… human connection is vital to our mental and emotional well-being. Yes, man can survive on food and water alone, but to go prolonged periods of time without the companionship of others is to hinder the possibility of personal and spiritual growth, leaving one stagnant in existence.

In partnership with my newfound, heartfelt mantra, I’ve set a goal to recognize the unique attributes of others and to pay compliments accordingly ~ in particular to women, because we females tend to possess lower self-esteem. It pains me to see so many spectacular ladies, both young and old, doubting their self-worth and sense of purpose in this world.

One of my good friends (one of the very ones I mentioned in the beginning of this blog) met me for dinner the other night, and over French cuisine and an excellent bottle of red wine, we discussed the value of my mission. She is of similar inclination, appreciating the Enchanted Zaftig concept, and together we came to the conclusion that an Enchanted Zaftig Challenge should be implemented. I’ve titled it EZ Challenge #1 (because there may be others forthcoming…)

Here it is:

EZ Challenge #1

Uplift your female sisters with words of encouragement. 

The next time you are out grocery shopping, walking the dog, enjoying a day at the park or visiting a friend, take a moment to say something encouraging to another woman. Compliment her hair, her clothing, her jewelry, her smile ~ the choice is up to you. Just give her that positive nudge. 

Try to implement this at least once a day. Even if it seems awkward or untimely,  have faith that your sentiment will leave a lasting impression on the recipient, long after the words have rolled from your tongue.

If you’re hesitant to join the challenge, consider this: when someone pays YOU a compliment, regardless of how significant, does it not prick you with a touch of affection and uplift your spirits, even if for only a short period of time?

Pay the sentiment forward.

And remember:

~ You are connected to everything. Love accordingly. ~

~*~*~*~*~

(On a side note: I would like to give recognition to the special men in my life who have also uplifted and encouraged me in so many ways. Please know that I value your friendships immensely and could never thank you enough!  <heart>) 

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Filed under A Touch of Inspiration, Musings and Thoughts

The Power of Words

Browsing through the thesaurus for synonyms to the adjective “fat”, one is faced with some pretty demeaning terms:

  • Obese
  • Hefty
  • Bovine
  • Butterball
  • Gargantuan
  • Bulky
  • Pudgy
  • Elephantine
  • Meaty
  • Whalelike

These words, when used in conjunction to describe someone’s body type, are quite offensive, wouldn’t you agree? Calling someone “bovine” ~ and thus comparing them to cattle ~ is not only distasteful but also completely false. There isn’t a human being out there in the world (that I’m aware of!) who even remotely resembles a cow.  The same goes for “elephantine” and “whalelike”. Please correct me if I’m wrong (and provide visual proof to corroborate your theory!)

Although “obese” is a common medical term used to describe people who don’t fall into a certain body-fat index,  it can still be harmful when characterizing someone’s weight. I’ve heard tell that, according to obesity guidelines, Marilyn Monroe was considered obese, which I find completely absurd!

Marilyn on the Beach

If Marilyn Monroe was obese, than I must truly be elephantine!

Personally, I find even the everyday term “fat” to be off-putting, despite its common usage. Perusing the internet for zaftig images and content, I often come across blogs and websites which utilize fat in the title in some way ~ “Lovely Fatties”, “Fat World”, “Fat and Fabulous” ~ and I admit that I am somewhat turned-off because the name denotes a derogatory tone, even if the content is valuable. Perhaps I am alone in this opinion; perhaps referring to oneself as fat is perfectly natural and uplifting. Then again, perhaps the plump woman down the street finds the term “zaftig” to be offensive.

The power of words…

Continuing to browse the thesaurus for synonyms to the adjective “fat”, one may be pleasantly rewarded with more affirming terminology, in stark contrast to the before-mentioned list:

  • Affluent
  • Influential
  • Cushy
  • Fertile
  • Flourishing
  • Fruitful
  • Lush
  • Thriving
  • Prosperous
  • Momentous
  • Voluminous

What imagery comes to mind when you read these words? Fertile, lush, thriving…  there is something beautiful and resplendent about them, as if they encompass the very essence of LIFE.

 

The Tree of Life, Stoclet Frieze ~ Gustav Klimt

Being referred to as voluminous would far uplift my spirits over being called gargantuan, which would grate against my very existence.

The power of words…

One must concentrate on the positive, refute the negative and always consider the connotations attached to what is spoken.

Choose wisely.

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Filed under A Touch of Inspiration, Musings and Thoughts

Who, Indeed?

via 'radicalselfacceptance'

A truth that can be altered. 

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Join In On The Conversation

I am pleasantly surprised by how many “hits” this blog has received since its inception just over three weeks ago. Every day, the numbers steadily rise, and I am delighted that there appears to be a genuine interest in the Enchanted Zaftig concept.

Since this blog platform tends to be somewhat limited in its interactive capabilities, I’ve created an Enchanted Zaftig page on Facebook. I encourage you to visit and share photos, thoughts and your own enchanted stories.

Together, we can propel the zaftig movement forward!

Image courtesy of Les Toil

 

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The Evolution of Attraction

This satiric drawing caught my eye awhile back as I was browsing the internet for zaftig images. 

Let’s take a moment to contemplate it, shall we…?  🙂

What do you see?

To me, the message presented here is both humorous and poignant: Man, in his most primitive state, once worshipped the abundant figure of the Venus of Willendorf. Now, in his most gluttonous state, man bows before the figure of a pencil-thin, svelte woman.

The theory seems quite logical, yes? The primitive man adored the Venus figure because she represented a voluptuous and fruitful life that was lacking in his own personal existence. Now, the modern-day man adores the slender figure because he’s binged on the marrow of life and over-indulged in its various forms of gluttony.

Perhaps this drawing depicts the “opposites attract” theory. Or, perhaps it demonstrates how our perceptions ~ what we consider pleasing to the senses and desirable ~ are ever-evolving, depending on our current circumstances and surroundings. Societal trends are rarely, if ever, constant, yet for most full-figured women (and men as well), it can be difficult to envision an existence where the Venus of Willendorf figure is once more worshipped (or, at the very least, considered acceptable.) 

Despite the evolution curve, when it comes to attraction and coupling, it is best left up to the individual to disregard current trends and delve deeper into his or her own soul to inquire: where do my true desires lay ~ in the current fad of human existence? Or somewhere more personal, where sincere and honest thoughts can thrive without societal influence?

*Despite all, Beauty should remain in the eye of the beholder* 

What is your perception? I welcome your feedback.

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Covering The Curves

For the majority of my formative years, and for quite a long time beyond that, I went through life a shy, self-conscious girl – frequently frowning upon my appearance, glancing at my reflection with contempt, tugging at my clothing to keep it from revealing too much. I couldn’t bear to see the slightest inclination of excess body fat on my figure. A ripple here, a roll there, made me feel awkward and unattractive.  

According to my mother, when I was quite young my pediatrician informed her that she should probably avoid feeding me “too many potatoes.” It was as though I had been born with some unknown propensity to become overweight, despite the fact that no one in my family was obese. Someone, somewhere, must have carried the gene and passed it on to me. To this day, I’m still not sure who that culprit is… 

Needless to say, as I entered into puberty (at an absurdly early age – which requires an entirely separate blog posting to properly describe) I became self-conscious about my physical development: my weight, my bosom, my child-bearing hips. I attempted to hide the female body that had been bestowed upon me by dressing in loose-fitting shirts that not only hid any signs of cleavage but also covered up any evidence of having hips. My entire mid-section became an embarrassment to me; covering it up helped to maintain some semblance of  self-esteem, although not completely, and certainly not for prolonged periods of time.

What was I thinking… ?

There I was, a vibrant, beautiful young woman with a winning smile and really great assets. And yet, when I looked at myself in the mirror, I simply couldn’t see beyond that extra, unwanted flesh. 

The sad part, the tragedy of it all, is that it took me 30 years to overcome such inclinations to hide myself.  Looking back on these photos from younger days, I’m amazed and saddened at my insistence to cover the curves. I was thinner back then than I am now! And yet, for decades, I couldn’t find the capacity to appreciate my ultra-feminine body.  

Now, I shall forever proclaim, “Peel away the layers of cloaking fabric and be liberated!”

Having come to that pivotal midway-point in life that everyone eventually reaches, I find myself  at a crossroads where I can either A.) embrace myself where I’m at or B.) invest in belly tucks and face-lifts. Personally, I choose to embrace myself where I’m at ~ curves, bosom, hips et al.

After all… rhinoplasty is really quite out of my budget…

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